The Great Hogwarts Food Fight
by SlytherinsScribe
Summary: In one of my earlier Marauder fics I mentioned this and had the urge to elaborate in a short oneshot. Hope you enjoy it!


Author's note: Here's just a short one-shot elaborating on one of Sirius' many plans that went awry while he was going to Hogwarts that is mentioned in my other fic, What Should Have Been A Good Year. Hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: If I owned Harry Potter, which I don't, would I really be writing this?

……

It was a rainy day sixth year at Hogwarts, James, Remus and Peter lounged on one of the many couches in the Gryffindor common room. Remus sat on one side, Peter on the other, with James lying upside down between them, his messy hair rubbing on the floor. It was strangely quiet, but Remus recognized the problem quickly, "Where's Sirius?"

James propped himself up with his arms, partially to stop the blood from rushing to his head and thought a moment, "Don't know, haven't seen him for an hour or so. But I'm beginning to get a bad feeling about this." The other two just nodded.

"Hey guys," Sirius said walking up, the classic mischievous Marauder grin on his face.

James looked worried, "What are you going to do this time?"

Sirius tried to look innocent, but failed, "What are you talking about Prongs?"

James stood up and crossed his arms, "I've known you for six years Padfoot, and when you have that look on your face you usually have a plan that gets you detention, and I get detention too for helping."

Sirius looked at him pleadingly, "Come on Prongs, I've been planning this for years-"

"It's not _that_ plan is it?" Remus interrupted, fearing the response.

"Yes," Sirius replied, "It's _that_ plan, what will be known in years as The Great Hogwarts Food Fight."

"Padfoot, it's not worth it," "You'll get caught." "You shouldn't do it, it's too dangerous," His friends begged trying to sway him to give up this particular plan, but their attempts were without avail.

The Great Hogwarts Food Fight idea had been born from Sirius noticing second year that at meals at Hogwarts the serving plates of food refilled themselves when they were emptied. He had told James it would be the perfect place for the ultimate food fight, back then James had agreed the idea was awesome at the least. They had decided they needed to wait for the right time, and then wasn't it because they already had detentions all that week for a prank they had pulled on Snivellous involving shampoo and bubotuber pus, it had been worth it though.

Sirius smiled, "I'm going to do it tonight." His fellow Marauders buried their heads in their hands and James ran his fingers through his hair.

"It's your funeral mate."

…..

It had been dreary all day, and in result the entire castle was in a glum mood, except for Sirius. The Marauders had continued to advise Sirius against the food fight even though they knew it was all in vain. At dinner Sirius was picking at his food while looking for the perfect opening, and he saw it. The Great Hall was layed out Gryffindors, then Ravenclaws, Hufflepuffs and Slytherins in that order. He saw a Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw fighting, said Ravenclaw had just broken up with a Slytherin that was on the other side of the Hufflepuff.

No more than thirty seconds after seeing this the Hufflepuff girl had been hit in the back of the head with chicken leg. She angrily whipped her head around to see the Ravenclaw girl with her back towards her laughing with her friends, soon after the Ravenclaw had mashed potatoes in her hair. She turned around and looked first at the Hufflepuff who hid her crime well, then at her ex-boyfriend. She threw a piece of bread towards him, but missed hitting Nott, who had a short fuse and no idea where the foreign piece of bread came from, and began throwing food everywhere.

Soon the air was thick with food and angry yells, but no matter how much food was thrown, more kept appearing. Teachers scurried around in vain attempt to stop the students, but weren't even noticed, all infuriated except Dumbledore who seemed to think it was all quite a funny sight and would later say it was children doing what children do best, making a mess. After about twenty minutes of madness the headmaster stood and yelled in a most un-Dumbledorish voice, "Stop!"

The Great Hall was instantly silent, facing Dumbledore other than a tomato that was mid-air hitting a young Severus Snape that was barely recognizable because of all the food stuck to him. Dumbledore looked from the guilty faces of the older children to the scared faces of those covered in food and finally the faces of the first years fearing expulsion, Dumbledore asked, "Who started this?"

Confusion set in, the Hufflepuffs blamed the Ravenclaw girl, the Ravenclaws blamed the one girls ex-boyfriend, the Slytherins blamed everyone but a Slytherin, but every Gryffindor pointed to the daring duo of Sirius Black and James Potter, James was pointing at Sirius. Every teacher knew well enough that usually when one of them did something wrong both were involved.

Dumbledore knew who started it all, mostly, "Will everyone but Mr. Black and Mr. Potter go clean themselves up and retire to their common rooms for the evening." James glared at Sirius but made no move towards the door, and with much restraint stopped himself from tackling his best friend for dragging him down with him. The Great Hall slowly emptied as students from every house went to their common rooms while talking excitedly about the food fight. Eventually the only ones remaining in the Great hall were Dumbledore, McGonagall, the two boys and a bunch of food that had been thrown.

Dumbledore walked slowly over to them with McGonagall in his wake, they were in for it.

……..

Half an Hour Later…

James was picking up what used to be food and throwing it in a huge black garbage bag. Why hadn't they believed him when he claimed to have nothing to do with this prank? Right, _you and Black have always been in together on these pranks of yours, why wouldn't you be now._ They had been punished with twenty-five points from Gryffindor each and having to clean the Great Hall by hand without magic under the watchful eyes of Professor McGonagall.

Sirius was on the other side of the hall cleaning as well, but he deserved to be, but not him, James Potter, Quidditch King. There was something he had to let Sirius know, "Hey Black!" He called across the Hall and McGonagall's eyes flashed at him.

Sirius looked up curiously, "Yeah?"

"I hate you." McGonagall now had a skeptical look on her face and was reaching for her wand, as if expecting us to begin fighting.

Sirius just smiled, "Hate you too James, ever since I met you first year. It was worth it, no?"

He had picked up what I meant instead of what I said, I remembered Snivellous covered in food, and nodded, "Well worth it." McGonagall rolled her eyes and yelled at us to get back to work.

……….

Harry Potter was serving detention under Snape his sixth year, writing over his dad and godfather's misdeeds as students when he became upon a card:

_Mr. James Potter and Mr. Sirius Black_

_Crime: The Great Hogwarts Food Fight_

_Punishment: 25 points each from Gryffindor _

_and cleaning up the mess from the food fight._

As miserable as Harry was he couldn't help but laugh. A food fight at _Hogwarts_, only a Marauder could have come up with that. He made a mental note to ask Remus about it if he ever got a chance. However, occupied with trying to imagine a food fight at Hogwarts he had momentarily stopped working and Snape snapped at him to begin working again.

…..

That's a rap, I mean, wrap –smiles-. Strangely enough I got this idea from watching CSI. Don't ask. Please respond, I wasn't really sure about this idea and would really like some input. Lemonbomber out, yo.


End file.
